Friday, June 17, 2011

The Borowitz Report: “Greece Offers to Repay Loans with Giant Horse”

“Greece Offers to Repay Loans with Giant Horse”
Steed Wheeled Into Brussels at Night
by Andy Borowitz

BRUSSELS (The Borowitz Report) – "In what many are hailing as a breakthrough solution to Greece’s crippling debt crisis, Greece today offered to repay loans from the European Union nations by giving them a gigantic horse. Finance ministers from sixteen EU nations awoke in Brussels this morning to find that a huge wooden horse had been wheeled into the city center overnight. The horse, measuring several stories in height, drew mixed responses from the finance ministers, many of whom said they would have preferred a cash repayment of the EU’s bailout. But German Chancellor Andrea Merkel said she “welcomed the beautiful wooden horse,” adding, “What harm could it possibly do?”

Elsewhere, when asked what he will do differently from Osama bin Laden, al-Qaeda's new leader said, "I won't let my iPhone use my current location."

And in political news, in a poll about a hypothetical matchup between Sarah Palin and Barack Obama, a majority of Palin voters answered, "What does hypothetical mean?"
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